“No matter what a woman looks like, if she’s confident, she’s sexy” – Paris Hilton
Well, for those of us who don’t have a drawer full, here are 4 simple strategies that will help you build confidence.
1. Accentuate the positive
Be your own best friend. What do you tell a friend who’s tried something new, whether or not it turned out well? At least you tried something new- good for you!
Accentuate the effort it took in doing something, rather than the final outcome. (You’d do it for your best friend, wouldn’t you?) We all have limitations. The key is to accept that you have them without dwelling on them.
2. Don’t be afraid to take some risks
When you are about to embark on a new experience, do you spend your time worrying so much about the outcome you aren’t enjoying the moment? If you look at new things in your life as a chance to learn something, it opens up the possibility of you becoming good at that something.
“The key to life is accepting challenges. Once someone stops doing this, he’s dead.” – Bette Davis
If you spend your time dreading the outcome, you’ll turn any opportunity there might have been into a failure. What’s more, we can’t grow when we are frozen with fear. Don’t set yourself up to fail. If you do, look at number one, again!
“The moment you doubt whether you can fly, you cease for ever to be able to do it.” – J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan
3. Use self-talk to keep assumptions away
We all use self-talk. The key is to use it in a way that we don’t form bad thoughts that can lead to permanent doubts. Catch yourself using negative self-talk and cancel it with something positive and not based on assumptions!
Build confidence by not expecting perfection from yourself at all times. You can only do your very best at something. Nobody can do everything perfectly, so why do you assume that you should be able to?
“Stop comparing yourself with others. If they are good at something, you too are good at something else. Self-confidence is not measured by your own capabilities versus that of others, but by your own needs.” – Stephen Richards, Develop Jedi Self-Confidence: Unleash the Force Within You
4. Learn to rely on your self-evaluation
If you always rely on the opinion of others, you’ll always be wondering what they think! That does nothing to build confidence – it tears it down, by giving away your personal power to others.
Focus on the real you, inside, to find out how you feel about your own actions, how you’ve been doing your job, etc. You’ll be developing a strong sense of who you are.
It’s important to remember that no one can be self-confident all of the time. In fact, you’ll build confidence faster and easier once your realize that.
Most people with low self-esteem or who lack in confidence are that way because of unrealistic expectations. They expect more from themselves than they do others.
A person with low self-esteem will think nothing about calling him or herself a ‘stupid idiot.’ They wouldn’t dream of saying that to someone else. To build confidence it’s a good idea to be your own best friend.
- Having A Low-Self Esteem Day? Here Are 10 Easy Ways To Get Over It (katerdickinson.com)
- The Differences Between Self-Esteem and Self-Confidence (theuplab.wordpress.com)
- Julie Miller – Melchizedek: Believe in Yourself (aquariusparadigm.com)